This section is about families, whether you’re an adoptive parent, birth parent, relative, foster carer, caregiver, young person or child.
Some children have not had the chance to develop a secure, positive, close relationship with a parent or caregiver in early life.
They may have often felt scared, alone, abandoned, hurt or hungry. They will have had no choice but to learn and develop a range of strategies to help them cope and get through the days.
If they were young, they wouldn’t know that many children do not have to do this. Their ways of getting by become their truths about life, about their family and about themselves.
Sometimes the outward signs of these early learnt strategies show up later, when children are living in other families, as visible worrying and challenging behaviours. Sometimes these hide the huge strengths and delightful characteristics that children have. As a result, parenting can feel difficult at times.
There are many ways that adoptive parents, relatives, foster carers, birth parents who can provide a safe home and residential staff can help children and young people who have had these experiences.